Male") which seems appropriate to this :
I've noticed for a long time that women often pursue activities they have no real interest in, driven by an obsession to prove something. There's always some obstacle they want to confront, the actual goal being secondary.
The part of the hypothesis about having sex creating a greater commitment on the part of the woman because there are "more risks" to her is outmoded and untrue.
Or have we forgotten AIDS? There are men and women both who are choosing to stay celibate until marriage because of that risk. That sure evens up the score.
Plus, it's awfully 19th century to imagine that women face a greater social stigma today in a westernized nation when they have sex. Let's not be absurd. I faced no such stigma when I got rid of my troublesome virginity 33 years ago, and there is no such stigma today.
I love this article. What a useful construct of how relationship dynamics work: I think the essential hypothesis, that P's feelings for Q depend on how P treats Q and not the other way around, is valid and insightful.
I think too that for many women, part of the energy we invest in "unworthy" men is a mothering kind of energy, trying to give enough to these men to help them finally grow up (as if it were possible for this to work.) A writer I like called it "misplaced nurturing".